Contradiction

I'm broken,
Irreparable, for there's nothing to do.

Why am I living in such a world?
A world full of miseries and distress.

All along have I've tricked myself,
Not knowing what a delusional place this is.

I don't ask for much,
Only a shoulder to lean on.

I don't crave a fancy life,
Only a friend to bare.

Do I deserve this?
Am I always going to stay broken?

Will this agony follow me wherever I go?
Till the day I die perhaps...

"You're not alone", they say
"We'll stick by your side when no one else does"

Speaking out of love
Yet no actions are made.

But here I am,
Putting on my best smile.

Showing the better side of me,
The intoxicated and content friend.

Back to reality.